THE BALTIMORE BEAUTY PAGEANT

I’ve never been but from my understanding, shit gets weird. Talents can range from burlesque to musical numbers to god know’s what else.

It’s basically like, if you took the authenticity of Hampden Fest with the clothing of HonFest and the originality of Artscape and ask everyone to compete, you’ve got THE BALTIMORE BEAUTY PAGEANT. 

Bring A Date?
You’ll have to bring someone that’s a bit twisted. Tickets are $15 each but it would make for a fun date, maybe not the first though. If you’re dating someone that you know would be down for this (especially if they’re into being up front), I’m sure you guys have really kinky sex. Good for you!

Find A Date?
This could be fun. Sit next to someone you find attractive and gauge their responses during the pageant. If they react similarly to you throughout the night or cringe a bit less than you, you’ve met your match. Buy that person a drink and ask what they’re hidden talent is.

TL;DR
Just in case I wasn’t enough of a freak alreadylet’s add a tiara!”


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